tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-61095040780574315912024-03-13T13:47:57.477-07:00incerto.pieces of this, that, and everything in between.freeze 2 farrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00757843797778640553noreply@blogger.comBlogger18125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6109504078057431591.post-5069264398851156192016-01-18T22:31:00.000-08:002016-01-18T22:31:02.168-08:00Lappy:: Describe a sunny day to a person who is born blind.<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #333333;"><b><u>This was actually an assignement for my Creative Writing class a few years ago. I really want to keep this forever, which is why it is here. </u></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #333333;"><b><u><br /></u></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #333333;"><b><u><br /></u></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; mso-ansi-language: EN;"> I
have a beautiful friend named Sal. She has beautiful brunette hair, fair skin
and a pair of mesmerizing honey brown eyes. Every time I look at her I feel
happy and sad at the same time. She always looks so cheerful and she always has
this positive aura that whoever approaches her, will feel as happy as her. But
it saddens me to know that despite having the beauty that she possesses
naturally, she couldn’t see it for herself. She always asks me about the view
from the top of our valley or what the park looks like during fall and winter.
I know that it kills her little by little on the inside every time she hears
people say “Oh it’s beautiful!!” when she couldn’t see a thing and it kills me a little too every time she says
“Oh I bet it’s very beautiful.” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; mso-ansi-language: EN;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; mso-ansi-language: EN;">One fine afternoon, she asked me to
take her to the park. We always go there for walks or play on the swings or
even just to sit quietly and enjoy each other’s silences. Suddenly, when we
were walking over a bridge, she asked me,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; mso-ansi-language: EN;">“Billy, how is the weather today?”
with a soft smile of her lips and her right little hand holding on to my arm.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; mso-ansi-language: EN;">“Well, it is sunny, Sal. Not the
‘oh, it’s very hot’ kinda sunny, but a picnic day kind of sunny.” I tried by
best to explain to her simply. I didn’t want to make her all worked up thinking
about what sunny days look like. But, the question didn’t stop there,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; mso-ansi-language: EN;">“Billy, I can’t see sunny day, I
can’t feel the sunny day. I want to see, Billy. I’m tired of living in the darkness.”
She said while holding her left hand out in motion of searching for something
to be held or felt- in this case the sunny day. Her voice was really sad and I
heard a little crack in it that I knew she was holding back tears. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; mso-ansi-language: EN;">“Sal, honey…” I took a deep breath
and hugged her. She had been holding on for so long and this was the time for
her loosen up her reigns. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; mso-ansi-language: EN;">“Sal, you don’t need eyes to enjoy a
sunny day. You don’t have to have eyes to see beauty. It’s not your eyes that tell
you about beauty, it’s your heart.” As I said that, her tears slowly fell and
rolling down her cheeks. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; mso-ansi-language: EN;">“For example, a snowy day could just
mean a white cold thing covering every inch of the surface- what’s the beauty
in that? This is for someone that can see but doesn’t put in any meaning to
what they see. They didn’t find beauty because they can’t see it with their
heart. They only see it with their physical sight. ” I saw her nod as a sign
that she had understood and wanted me to keep going.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; mso-ansi-language: EN;">“Sal, all you need to do is see
things with your heart, feel. I can help you. Here.” I took her right hand and
lead her to the side of the bridge. I put her hand on the bridge’s handle. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; mso-ansi-language: EN;">“You feel that? That’s the warmth of
the sun.” I then pulled her to the field nearby the bridge.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; mso-ansi-language: EN;">“Come Sal, lie down next to me. Just
relax.” She lied down next to me with her hands behind her head- she did looked
relax.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; mso-ansi-language: EN;">“Do you feel the warmth of the sun
on your skin?” I asked and she said,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; mso-ansi-language: EN;">“Yeah, it’s very relaxing. And the
grass is so soft and warm, I feel like sleeping on a warm comfortable bed.” I
said while smiling.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; mso-ansi-language: EN;">“Yeah, I agree. Now, do you smell
that? It’s food- delicious food.” I said while doing a sniffing sound and she
did the same too.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; mso-ansi-language: EN;">“Now can you hear that? Children are
laughing and screaming playing with each other-”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; mso-ansi-language: EN;">“I bet they are on a picnic!” she
said just before I could finish.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; mso-ansi-language: EN;">“Yes, you’re absolutely right. Now, can
you feel their happiness?” I try to say that as<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="_GoBack"></a> softly as
possible because I’m afraid that it would upset her thinking that she can’t see
them being happy. But instead she said,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; mso-ansi-language: EN;">“Yes, I do. And it’s very
contagious! I feel like running and playing with them too! ” She said with an
upbeat voice. “Oh! I can hear birds chirping! How nice! ” She suddenly got up
and run towards the middle of the field with her arms stretched out to her
sides. When she ran, her hair flew hard like she was waving a brown flag tied
on her head. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; mso-ansi-language: EN;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; mso-ansi-language: EN;">“Billy!!” I ran to her side and her
hand caught my arm again. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; mso-ansi-language: EN;">“Sal…”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; mso-ansi-language: EN;">“I can see it Billy. And it’s
beautiful!” She said with tears of happiness in her eyes. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6109504078057431591.post-72953025279353493472013-11-09T06:52:00.000-08:002013-11-09T06:52:04.627-08:00Lappy:: Diary of a Moth
<span style="font-size: small;">I am nothing but a
moth. In my short life, I never get to know my name. Maybe it’s
because I don’t have one and there’s no one here to call me
or talk to me or even ask my name. So, there’s no need for that
trouble because there’s nobody here except me. Zero. None; I am all
alone. </span><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<div align="JUSTIFY" style="widows: 136;">
<span style="font-size: small;"> “You are not
alone, I am here with you. Though we are apart, you’re always in my
heart…,” </span><br />
</div>
<br />
<div align="JUSTIFY" style="widows: 136;">
<span style="font-size: small;">How I wish this to
be true for me. I heard this song once from some random student’s
MP3 player. Yes, I know songs. I know Michael Jackson. I am one
clever moth. Clever- but lonely. Don’t be surprise, but I live in
a library where it is so cold, quiet, big and interesting- just my
kind of scene. I never actually knew how an insect like me could
actually know and learn so much. Being a moth, I could fly everywhere
and see almost everything and this is my way of learning. I observe
almost every inch of this library from up-top to down-below and it is
very entertaining and educational as well. Weird when the word
‘educational’ comes out from a moth’s mouth. But yes, it’s
true. I love watching various modes and moods of the students. There
are noisy students, sleepy students, and diligent students and then
there are some hard-thinking students; now I don’t really
understand this kind of students because they always stare into blank
spaces, some even stare out the window. I only assume that they got a
lot on their mind that all of the work and fun take place in their
head; how chaotic.</span></div>
<br />
<div align="JUSTIFY" style="widows: 136;">
<span style="font-size: small;"> </span></div>
<br />
<div align="JUSTIFY" style="widows: 136;">
<span style="font-size: small;"> I also love to
listen to their talk, discussions, and gossips or even for those who
listen to the MP3 so loud that I can hear the music miles away. It is
sad to think that some people do not really care to mind what they
say. I am an ordinary moth but even so, what people say is hurtful
even when they’re not even talking about me. But I can feel the
pain because these people, they really care a lot about looks and
appearance. Materialism. Beautiful, handsome, rich; Cool. Ugly, poor;
Loser. It is sad because I am an ugly moth. Compared to a butterfly,
my colours are dull. If I were to fly in front of a group of people,
I am practically invisible and nobody will notice me. But, for a
butterfly, it will turn heads and there will be smiles, camera
clicking and people would even chase it. I am a loser. </span></div>
<div align="JUSTIFY" style="widows: 136;">
</div>
<br />
<div align="JUSTIFY" style="widows: 136;">
<span style="font-size: small;"> I am not trapped
in this library. I choose to be in this library to alienate myself
from all of the beauty outside. Truthfully said, I have inferiority
complex. Here, I don’t have to compare myself between all of the
butterflies out there and the beautiful flowers. I can be content
with the belief that I am the only unique being here and I can do
whatever I want. But on the other hand, I am lonely. I am confused
and I am sad. Why can’t I be beautiful? Why can’t I mingle and
have friends or be in a group like the students in this library? Am I
that pathetic? Maybe I am similar to the lonely students studying in
the library on their own. They look independent and comfortable and
they survive. Maybe I’m like that as well? But I can’t say that.
Those students look alone but that doesn’t mean that they’re
lonely. It’s not fair for me to compare myself to them. I am just a
moth. I am alone but sadly, I am lonely. </span><br />
</div>
<br />
<div align="JUSTIFY" style="widows: 136;">
<span style="font-size: small;"> I fly around when
I think. I fly around when I’m sad. I fly around when I feel lonely
because I will try to find some crowded place so that I could busy
myself with indulging in their discussions. There are a couple of
times that I almost get slapped or get smashed by a book. I don’t
know why but these humans hate me. I don’t know what their problem
is. Do I smell? Am I too loud? I know this is a library, but I don’t
think I made that much noise. Does my existence bother people? Even
the humans don’t accept me. Maybe I shouldn’t care that much. I
am better off alone. </span>
</div>
<br />
<br />
<div align="JUSTIFY" style="widows: 136;">
<span style="font-size: small;"> I need to make a
landing. Thinking too much – like now - is not really good for me,
I could fall into depression if I keep this up. Wait, that looks
interesting. I have never seen this book before. There are a lot of
colours and images. Very interesting! Wait, I have seen this, this
looks like a—no, these are organs. Human organs I think. I‘ve
seen these before. There are a lot of science students studying here.
This is beautiful, the paper is nice too; smooth and it’s cold. I
could lay here and sleep all day if I want too but – Hey!—why has
it gotten dark? Who closed the drapes? Oh wait a minute, NO! Wait!! I
have to fly--</span></div>
<br />
<div align="JUSTIFY" style="widows: 136;">
<br />
</div>
<br />
<div align="JUSTIFY" style="widows: 136;">
<span style="font-size: small;"> </span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6109504078057431591.post-89499974834006928882013-11-02T17:48:00.003-07:002013-11-02T17:48:59.999-07:00100 word story #1
<br />
I would- if I could- just cry and cry and cry. I'm not sad but
still I'll cry. Crying is not a sin, it's not something to be ashamed
about because it is a relief. It's an escapism. So I will cry because
my heart needs to escape. It can't handle of confusion, too much hope
and happiness. It doesn't trust itself to not doubt every single one
of them. So I cry; secretly hoping that my little dark cocoon will
leak- and I'll slither myself out of it. To cry is not a cowardice
act. It's an act of freedom.
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6109504078057431591.post-72273524795897120942013-07-19T11:06:00.000-07:002013-07-19T11:06:19.015-07:00Lappy:: Sally #1She closes her eyes as the wind blows through her hair. she feels like she's flying as she spread her arms out to her sides. She smiles and finally opens her eyes. The sun is setting and she sits down quietly. Just enjoying the silence and the beautiful sunset like there is no care in the world. "Wouldn't it be nice to do this everyday?" she thought. <br />
<br />
"Sally!!! Come down this instant!! Whatchu doing up there? you crazy?!" An annoying voice calls for her and with a heavy heart, she climbs down the roof through the attic. It's the second time that she was caught by Sam, her little sister. A little bossy for a 'little' sister huh? She better keep a look out and stay away from the roof for a little while or she is sure that Sam is going to tell on her. <br />
<br />
Sally walks to her bedroom, shuts the door and begin to sketch right away. She is a very talented artist. Or at least she hoped to be. She just loves to draw. anything that she sees or that she likes- what ever that inspires her, she will draw. No matter how it turned out to be, she will be happy and content by it. It is very rare to see this kind of attitude from other people because people nowadays always look and expect too much from the final result and not the process or the love and passion for it. It's such a pity. That is why Sally only draws and keep her drawing in her own private room. It is her own world and that is where she can truly be herself and be happy to express. She feels that the world is cruel and unjust. But then, she had a glimpse of hope that it isn't all true. There is beauty in the world. Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6109504078057431591.post-39833881351775840722013-03-06T23:41:00.000-08:002013-03-07T06:00:06.831-08:00Sense: Look, listen, touch<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigAIyMELH49fgSTbb25CiSDLDxa8pwaYFxo1h5bSPzbziRVUgg_jKGMvGthWpwQ11SYvl909BNoiZ9SJFlnIG3a7jCA5olf8m9Nz2dPcxK8qey9o-VmIhCW3v1_sksZKRrR0KWGdnb5Uo/s1600/Picture0178.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="239" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigAIyMELH49fgSTbb25CiSDLDxa8pwaYFxo1h5bSPzbziRVUgg_jKGMvGthWpwQ11SYvl909BNoiZ9SJFlnIG3a7jCA5olf8m9Nz2dPcxK8qey9o-VmIhCW3v1_sksZKRrR0KWGdnb5Uo/s320/Picture0178.jpg" width="320" /></a></span></div>
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<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: center; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: center; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: large; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;"><b><u>Look; Anya</u></b></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">“Kelana!!
Can you pleeeaasse close the fridge’s door after you took something out of
it??! It’s become a habit of you hasn’t it? What, do you think I’m your maid
who’ll do anything for you? Close the door! Go on!” </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">I
moved my head signaling to the opened fridge. I can’t even describe how mad I
am with that boy! Does he think that he can just come around, poke his head
inside the fridge, take the things that he want and then just leave the door
open? Oh no, no. Not under my supervision! I mean, I know he is just four years
old and he can barely understand a word I was saying just now. Just look at his
face, all cute with those big brown eyes and curly hair. Adorable! He is my
youngest brother and I love him so much. That is why I decided that I would not
spoil him. Ahah, he closed the fridge’s door!</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Haa..there you go.. Good boy…you deserve some
milk! Tadaa!!” I showed him his milk bottle. He giggled when he got his prized
possession. I was actually preparing his milk while he rummaged through the
fridge just now. I know that he is a bit too old to be drinking from a baby
bottle, but I figured that there is no harm in that. He must have been hungry.
Being the only ‘adult’ in the house everyday like this (actually it is only
during daytime while Mom and Dad are out at work) taking care of four hungry
monsters are sometimes just too much for me to handle. But they are my flesh
and blood. Who would take care of them while our parents are out working if not
me? So, every time I feel like breaking down or crying, I’ll just swallow that
feeling and put on my ‘macho’ face. Actually I don’t think I can put up a
‘macho’ face. I’m a girly girl! My face is too soft to be ‘macho-ish’. Oh
shoot! We’re late!!</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">“Guys!
Come on! Get all your stuff and hurry! I have to walk you to the nanny’s house
before it gets too late! I have a test today!” Well actually the nanny’s house
is just two houses away, and it’s not really that far or that it will take a
long time to get there but you know, better be early than sorry. “Kelana, do
you have your backpack on you?” he just nods to my question since he still has the
teat of his milk bottle inside his mouth. “Ok, let’s get you there fast because
I need to hurry.” I grabbed his free hand and guide him out of the house. This
is my routine everyday.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 4;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>*********</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">After
I sent Kelana and Farissa, the second youngest in the family (she is six years
old), to the nursery, I set out to school with Lisa who is in Standard 6 and
Dalil who is in Form 1. We walk to school together, or actually we don’t. They
have their own friends to walk with and I just tail along at the back just to
make sure that they do get to school safely. It is my responsibility. Usually I
have Amar to walk with me but I don’t know, maybe he is late today, as per
usual. He is always late and rushing. Ahah! Speak of the devil! Look at him, hastening
with his tie, with his ruffled hair and his….wait a second, is that eye goop I
saw?? Euww!! He is just plain MESSY! I don’t know what is to become of this
guy. Anyway, no matter how unorganized that guy is, he is my best buddy. We
have been friend since forever! He is the only close friend that I have. It
might sound weird but I actually don’t have any girlfriends. I’ve had one or
two who stuck around for a few years and then vanished with another cooler
group or richer girls. Oh well, I couldn’t care less. Guy friends are more
loyal anyway and they don’t just gossip all day long. Blurrggh! Whatever! It’s
time to mess with Amar’s head! My favourite time of the day! </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">“Hi
Amar! What’s up with you? Coming to school looking like a zombie everyday. Do
you think you’re <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">gonna</i> get the girls
looking like this? Huh?” His expressions on my comments were just priceless
that I just started bursting with laughter. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">“Yeahh,
yeahh..Laugh all you want Anya! You should know very well why I’m always like
this.” Then he just ignores me busying himself with his tie. Of course I know
why he is always like that. Amar (his real name is Zamani but he made people call
him Amar because he hates the real one) has this huge trouble of waking up in
the morning. His mother used to take more than half hour knocking on his
bedroom door calling him to wake up but Amar is just like a hibernating polar
bear that refuse to wake up and choose to curl up in his blanket instead. There
were times when his sweet mother was late to go to work just because Amar could
not wake up to go to school. If it was just any normal day, his mother would
have just left him sleeping but that day was PMR examination day, so his mother
had to wake him up no matter what. The reason why he has trouble waking up is
because he stood up until half the night painting or drawing those artsy fancy
things that he does which I could never understand. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">Since
he is almost done with his tie, I started asking “Are you going to the training
this afternoon? It’s really important you know and don’t you dare try to skip
it. We got that big tournament coming up and we can’t slack off..” I started
babbling when he suddenly stops on his track. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">“What?
Why are we stopping?” I looked at him. Puzzled.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">“Before
we start walking again, can you stop babbling? It’s really early in the morning
and I don’t need you to ruin my day before I even get to drink my morning
coffee. Okay?” Yes, he is a coffee person. “Can’t you see that I’ve already get
this big bag over here? What do you think this is for?” He looked at me with a
totally annoyed face that I can’t help but to smile and he smiled back. That’s
just how we are. We bicker every single time of the day that sometimes we don’t
even realize what we are arguing about. I know it is ridiculous but it is fun. “Ok,
ok, I can see your big bag alright. But there is no harm to make sure that you
are really going. You are going right?” I asked him again but this time it is
just to mess with his head and he saw right through my plan and instead of
getting an answer, I get a knock on my head.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Ouch!” </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">“Serve
you right for messing with me like that! Now let’s hurry up to class before we
get into trouble you silly girl.” With a wide grin that shows lines of perfect
white teeth on his face, he nudge my shoulder with his to signal me to keep
walking and our banter just continues up until we get into our own classes.
Amar’s class is at the back since he is taking Art Stream and my class is
located at the other end of the building. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; margin-left: 165.85pt; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">****** </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">From
where I am standing I can see Amar sitting alone staring into (I follow the
direction of his gaze)…nothing. Is he actually dreaming in the middle of
practice?? How could he? I mean, it’s not even the perfect time to daydream.
The sun is blazing, burning my skin producing red dots all over my face. I get
sun burn everyday nowadays. Like I said before, this is not the best time to
day dream. It is HOT! Right now, my sweat is prickling down my forehead and
down my back sending chills down my spine from all those running and dribbling
and passing practice. Oh, I forgot to mention that I am on the school football
team for girls! Football has always been my passion since I was little. I guess
I got it all from my mother. Yeah, my mom is the one who’s all crazy about
football. My father is never the sporty type. He prefers cooking, a talent that
I believe I possessed as well. I’m just multi talented. Anyway, where was I?
Yes, football. So my mom is the one who is into sports. Back at home, we watch
football matches every week in any league, Malaysian League, Barclays Premier
League, La Liga, you name it, we watch it.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This is how I developed my love towards
football. Even my brother is on the school football team. The only problem is,
the girl’s football team at my school SUCKS! Everyday since I was thirteen,
when I first join the club, I dreamed of winning trophies and tournaments. I
dreamed of glory but all I got is loser doom. It is their entire fault! Look at
my useless teammates! They only join this club because it is compulsory, none
of them actually know how to play or even want to play. All they ever do at
practice is sit around in one corner and gossip, giggle, gossip again, watch
the boys practice, gossip again and the giggle some more. They just drive me
CRAZY! It’s not like I’m against any gossiping but you have to know the limit.
When they don’t practice, we always lose! It’s even embarrassing to play with
them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wish I can play with the boys. They
always win and if we add a super striker like me to the team then maybe we
could win even more! Imagine how I will lift the championship trophies..What a
triumph! And then I’ll….Wait! What am I doing? Now I’m the one who’s dreaming
at practice! Shoot! I better go to Amar.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">“Hey!
Are you slacking off again?!” I give him little pull on his messy head. Yuck!
It’s sweaty.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">“Why
you little…Can you not do that? You startled me Anya.” He exclaimed. He looks
pissed but I’m not scared. He’s just my Amar. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">“Well,
don’t blame me.. I’m just waking you up from your ‘daydream’. What were you
think about anyway? Do you have girl problem? Huh? Tell me. Come on, tell me.”
I nudge him with my elbow a few times and he rolls his eyes in annoyance. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">“Do
you have to mess with me now? Really, do you? You want to smell my armpit? Huh?
You want some of this??” he started grabbing my head pulling me towards his
armpit and I cry begging him to let me go. His shirt is wet and he really
smells! Gross! He’s such a jerk when it comes to getting back at me. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">“Now
you know eh? Don’t mess with me or you’ll get some more!” and then he laugh a big
laugh when he saw my expressions and as usual when I see him laugh, I’ll laugh
too. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">“You’re
such a jerk, you know that?” I make a face and he laughs again.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">“Yeah,
I know. That’s why you can’t leave without me right?”</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">“Heh!
You wish!” Ignoring him, I put my legs forward and does a hamstring stretch. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">“Ha!
Ha! Actually I was just thinking of treating you for persuading me to join this
club but because you are too ‘kind’ to me, that intention has been cancelled!”
I just give him a look because I don’t really believe what he is saying.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">“Ahem!
I see you got new shoes. It’s pink. Nice!” he lift his right eyebrow a few
times. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">“What
these?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t know. I found these on my
shoe rack this morning with my name on it. I guess mum bought it for me but she
didn’t get the chance to tell me. She knew I need a new shoe anyway.” I gave
him a weak smile and start getting up to run one last lap.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">Even
though that is what I told Amar but I don’t actually believe it myself. My mum
couldn’t have possibly bought this gorgeous pink A</span><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">didas Predator LZ DB and plus it’s a grade A
boot not the cheap lower grades boots that I always purchase. It could cost up
to RM 700 and mum definitely could not afford a boot at this price! She’s got
other bills to pay. It’s kind of weird because I keep getting gifts from out of
nowhere lately and it’s always the things that I need. I want to ask Amar if he
has anything to do with it but I’m shy so I keep it to myself.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">“Hey are you coming with me
to the cafe this evening? We promised Adam that we’ll come remember? It’s been
a while since we last hangout together.” I don’t now since when but Amar is
suddenly running besides me.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">“I know, but I can’t Amar. I
have to babysit this evening. The nanny has some urgent matter so I have to
take care of Kelana and Farissa. Maybe I’ll see him at the carnival. We’re
still going to that right? Send my regards to Amar okay? I miss him.” And with
those last words, my face goes red. I am flushing. Oh my God! I cannot let Amar
see so I run faster so that he’ll trail behind. What is up with me? It’s not
like Adam is Jude Law (although he does have Jude’s jaw)!! He’s actually so
handsome. Stop! What am I thinking? He’s our friend. (Actually I forgot to
mention that I have another best buddy called Adam. Sorry Adam.) He’s been with
us since he first moved here with his family. I was the first one who talked to
him because if it were up to Amar, he wouldn’t care to make new friends. We
were only six and seven at that time. It is ten years later now. We’ve grown
and I’ve somehow grown fond of Adam. But he is so mysterious and I don’t know
much about him like how I know Amar but it’s his mysteriousness that I find
charming and the way he smiles...Hmmm... Aahh! I don’t want to get it all over
my head! Shoo! Shoo!</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 3;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>******</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">I wake up this morning with
my stomach growling, asking for food. So I drag my body out of bed and go
straight to the kitchen to look for food. I hope the kitchen is already smoking
with fried sausages on the pan and hot scrambled eggs readied on a plate with
baked beans on the side. Mmmm..even the idea of it makes my mouth water. I
quickened my steps to the kitchen with my hopes getting higher with each step I
take. But to my dismay, when I get into the kitchen, no deliciously cooked food
is waiting for me. All I see are dishes piled up from last night’s dinner in
the sink and the kitchen table is in a mess with bread crumbs and spilled jams.
I guess I have to get started with cleaning and cooking this morning. When I am
done with all the cleaning, I wipe my hands and go to see if I can get
something to cook from the fridge. When I open it, another disappointment strikes
me and my stomach. It is totally empty! Totally cleaned off! Now there’s
nothing to cook. I know because just now when I went to the food cabinets, it
is also empty. So, reluctantly I go to my parents’ room and knocks on the door. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">“Mom, dad... there’s no food
in the fridge...Wake up. It’s almost eleven..” there is no reply but I hear
sounds from the room so I wait outside the room for them to come out and at
last my mom shows up. She looks beaten up. She must have come home very late
last night. Mom and dad are working at a restaurant. Mom is the waiter and dad
is the cook. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">“Honey, can’t you just cook
something? Toast the bread or fry the eggs. Me and your daddy will buy the
groceries later ok?” she looks so troubled that I can sense something is off.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">“I would just toast a bread
mum but there isn’t any left even the eggs. The kids are going to wake up soon
and they’ll want something to eat. Can’t you give me some money? I’ll go out
and buy something.” </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">“Anya...I..We can’t..” she
trails off in her words and I figure it out already.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">“You don’t have any money
again, do you mum? And daddy too?” My eyes are starting to tear up because we
just had this same situation a few days ago.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">“Look Anya, it’s very hard
for us right now.. The restaurant is not doing well so some of our wages have
been cut off. Your dad and I are trying very hard to make it for us. I’m even
trying to find a new job. We just have to be patient for a little bit.”</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">“I get it mum.. I understand
very well.. And maybe I can help you a little. I can work part time after
school. I can give up football to help, you know..We need food in this house
and Kelana still needs his formula milk and that is almost finished
too...and..”</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">“Stop it Anya! I don’t want
to hear it anymore! We are your parents and we can still provide for you and
your siblings! I know you are smart and capable but you don’t need to show that
off on our faces! We might not have the best education or the best jobs but we
can still provide for all of you..” Her words struck me like thunder. I never
meant to be those things that she accused me of. I was only thinking of my
brothers and sisters. This is where my sadness turns to rage and then something
comes out of my mouth before I can stop it.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">“You are sad mom! You’re
pathetic! If you can’t provide for us, just admit it! The fridge has been empty
for forever and you don’t have to give us any more reasons for that. You are
too proud to admit that we are broke. We are broke mom. Broke!” <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I said all that right in front of my mom’s
face and she looks devastated. I regret it immediately. I cannot believe what
has just come out of my mouth...</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">“I’m sorry mom.. I’m sorry..
I shouldn’t have said that. I shouldn’t have said anything..I’m so sorry.”
Tears begin to streak down my face and I can see tears in her eyes too. I am so
ashamed of myself that I started backing away from her, from everything. I run
out of the house feeling angry. Not to anyone else but to myself and I run to
look for myself that I just lost. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 5;"> </span>******</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">A few days after the
‘incident’ mom and I still has not talk to each other. I avoid her paths
whenever necessary and she does not even look or ask for anything. Anything she
wants to say to me was conveyed through either my dad or my brother. Maybe she
thinks it’s better that way.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">I am watching the TV when my
phone suddenly rings in my room . I feel so lazy to go and pick it up but
thinking that it might be an important call, I get up anyway. Oh, it’s Amar.
What does he wants now?</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">“Hello, Amar what do you
want? I’m watching TV right now..” </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">“Anya…I need you
Anya..please quick! It’s my mom…” the panic in his voice makes me panic as
well. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">“Amar are you ok? What
happened to your mom? Is she alright??” my hands started trembling as I thought
of his mother and my mother. Oh God please don’t let anything happen to them. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">“She pass out at home just
now.. She’s been having this headache for weeks but she refused to go to
clinic. Now she’s lying here and I don’t know what will happen. Can you please
come Anya? I’m really scared…” </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">His pleading voice is one
that I never heard before and with that I said,</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">“I’ll come Amar, of course
I’ll come. You just wait there alright. I’ll be there..”</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 4;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>******</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">When Adam immerged into the
Emergency room’s hallway, he looks stricken and worried and he goes straight
towards his father who’s apparently a doctor here. Not just any doctor, a
specialist! When he finishes talking to his dad, he turns towards us. He gave a
pat on Amar’s shoulder and then he said something about leaving Amar’s mother
under our care for a while. Does that mean it’s going to be just the two of us?
Slowly I look at him and then for a split second our eyes meet before I pull my
gaze away. Oh God, my heart is thumping!</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">“Ahem! Yeah Amar. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Go and win that tournament for your mom.. I
promise I’ll never leave her side. Adam’s here too right?” with that he nods
and started to leave. He reminds me about a hundred times to give him a call if
anything happens before he leaves. I am finally alone with Adam now…Awkward…</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">“Hmm.. Nice shirt.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What?? Nice shirt?? Out of ALL the great
things that I could say I chose ‘nice shirt’? That is just plain pathetic!
Arrggh! But I managed a weak smile in front of him. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">With a half laugh, he says,
“ Oh this? Thank you.. actually Amar bought this for me from one of his flea
market I guess..” </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">“Ohh..” is all I could
managed. I nod a few times just to fill the moment and then I said it, “You
never told me your dad is a doctor.”</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">“There’s a lot of things
that I didn’t tell you Anya..” he said with the most charming smile I had ever
seen.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">“I think I know that now..
but I never understand why you’re being so mysterious and secretive. We don’t
even know where you live after 10 years together..”</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">“ There’s a lot of things
going on in my mind and in my life that I think you and Amar should not know. I
live in two different worlds. You guys are in my happy side of the world and I
don’t want to bring anything from the sad side to the both of you..” he said
all of that with that smile still on his face and that makes my heart melts
like butter.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">“ I think I understand..
there are some things that ought not to be shared even with your best friends,
right?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I gave him a reassuring smile
that sends a message saying ‘It’s ok..’</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; margin-left: 2.0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>******</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 49.5pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">After the ‘crisis’ that had
happened to Amar’s mother, I made up with my mother immediately. I begged for
her forgiveness for everything that I have said and done and she forgave me.
Everything has been better in my family since then. Mom and dad even got new
jobs that pays better and does not consume as much time. And Aunty has been
recovering very well indeed after the operation. The doctors managed to get the
tumour out of her brain safely. Thank God it was only a small tumour.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 49.5pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 49.5pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">Oh, I found out through
Adam’s letter after that day we spent together at the hospital that he is the
one who has been giving me all those gifts. He said that he did all that
because he couldn’t stand seeing me going through all those troubles
alone..and.. he also told me in the letters about how he actually feels about
me and I am quite delighted to know that I’m not the only one who felt it.. I
wonder what Amar would say if he knows about us.. I bet he’s going to tease us
to death as he’s always do!</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 49.5pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 49.5pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">I might seem all happy and
cheerful on the outside but under all these façade, I am just another troubled
teenage girl who is dealing with the challenges in her life no matter how big
or small it is and if anyone dare to look closely, they’ll see what’s really
inside of me. And I think Amar and Adam did look that’s why they understand me
the best.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 49.5pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 49.5pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">I have to go now because we
are meeting at our usual place. (Actually it’s their usual place. I don’t
really fancy coffees.) Anyway, this is the last hangout session before Adam
goes to the city with his father. He’s actually going to help his father at one
of his father’s clinics that needs extra hands. I’ll miss him when he’s gone
but thank God I still have Amar for a company. Got to go now! CIAO! </span></span></div>
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<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><u><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 16.0pt; line-height: 150%; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">LISTEN;
ADAM TAUFIQ</span></u></b></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “ADAM!” I cover my ears as my name is
being called. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “Adam!” Again, I hear my name being
shouted from down stairs. </span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">It has been called a few times before and it’s
getting annoying really. So, at last I give up and go out of my bedroom. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “What is it now, dad?” I shout back
reluctantly.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “Come down for a sec” Dad reply. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">He’s really lucky that I’m in a good mood
today, to even respond to his call. If not, I’d be locked in my room studying
or something. I’m like that sometimes. It’s actually good to be alone once in a
while, it helps you to rejuvenate. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “Sit
down son, let’s have a little chat.” Says dad; trying to take control over the
conversation before it even began. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">We have gone through this kind of
situation for quite some time now after we have had “the talk” and I’m
beginning to see a pattern here. I know what he’s going to say. But I guess I
should just play along. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “So, have you thought about what I said
before?” His face is hopeful but I can see that he’s trying to be careful not to
make it too obvious. But I knew better.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “Yeah dad, I have. But my decisions are
still the same.” And with that, his face fell. I can see the disappointment and
sadness in him. I do feel bad disappointing him, especially about this matter.
But I must make him understand. I really must. It involves my future and I
refuse to let people set them for me. </span><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “I’m really sorry, dad. I know how much
you want me to..” </span><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Before I could finish, his beeper goes
off. He raises his hand as a gesture for me to pause. That’s it! I can’t take
this anymore. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have just about enough
of this. Every time we are about to have one of these important talks, his
beeper will interrupt and he would have to rush to the hospital for emergency.
I know that he is not to be blamed but somehow, we will always end up
quarreling. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So much for communication. I
ignore his hand gesture and just go straight up to my room. What’s the point in
having a professional surgeon who owns a few clinics as a father if he can’t
even dissect what’s in his own son’s heart? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">****************************************************<br /></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>I’m
holding on to my cold caramel cappuccino. Smelling the killer aroma; so
inviting. I’m just about to have a little taste of heaven in a cup when someone
pocked me on the back. Before I could turn around to see who that was, a messy
looking boy sits in front of me without even being invited. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “Dude! Do you know how long I’ve been
waiting for you? Why don’t you just come by next year while you’re at it?” I
exclaimed. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">It may sound as if I’m mad at him, but I know that he knows that I’m
kidding, even though I did literally waited for him for about half an hour.
But, I don’t really mind, I know how he is with his business. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “Aawwhh chillax Adam. Don’t be such a
fuss, you know I love you.” Amar bats his eyelashes and gives an apologetic
look. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Honestly, I usually am able to ignore that silly face of his but I think
that this is the best one yet and I couldn’t do much but to laugh at his
expression. He is really good at it though, I wonder why he never considers to
becoming an actor. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “Hah! You silly old brute!” I give him a
quick light punch on his shoulder. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “You want to order? ” I ask him, feeling
relaxed. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “Of course. I can’t be sitting here doing
nothing but looking at your face all day can I?” He burst out laughing. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “Yeah well, I know I am not much to look
at <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>apart from my<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Jude Law’s jaw, Shah Rukh Khan’s eyes
and<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Robert Pattinson’s hair, I can see
why that tortures you. I’m irresistible.”</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Now it’s my turn to burst a laugh. He
raises his hands as a sign of defeat. He gives up so easily which makes it
boring. I always enjoy his rebuttal- it makes things much fun and pretty much brightens
up my day.</span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “So, How about it? The usual?” I ask him again
as he calls the waiter to order his hot café latte. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">It’s funny how we turned out to be coffee
people which are one of the things we have in common. Truth to be told, I
really miss this little guy. Even though he’s a year younger, I can’t really feel
the difference because he seems mature for his age and we can get along really
well. The fact that I knew him since I was eight, that doesn’t really matter
because there are people that knows other people since they were born or even
their own family but still cannot get along. This makes me appreciate him and
Anya very much. Anya, our third musketeer, is a very cheerful girl which is
also one of our childhood friends. She can’t join us today because she has to
babysit her younger brothers and sisters while her parents are out working. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “It’s
been a while Adam, how are you? And how’s your study? I guess SPM really drains
you out huh? I can see that you haven’t been sleeping well.” Amar starts the
conversation. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I always knew that he’s such a good observer. He manages to
notice a little minor detail about anything that he can lay his eyes on, which
is really cool. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> I chuckled “Yeah, I’m alright as always.
Studying has never been a problem for me- you know that don’t you?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I guess it’s just the nerve.” I answered
truthfully, leaving the family stuff out of it. It’s never appropriate to talk
about your family problems to anybody, even your best friends. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “Good for you, man. Hey, have you checked
out my new gallery?” He asks. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I certainly have. Amar
is one of the greatest artistes I know. He always manage to catch my breath
with his every drawing- Like I said, he’s very observant and he draws
everything that he sees with the little details. I really envy him, to have
that kind of talent. He can even survive living in the street. It’s not that he
lives there but he might as well be. He’s good with public transport, he knows
the ways; the cheapest and delicious place to eat, where and how to get here and
there- like I said, it’s like he practically live there. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “What kind of question is that? Of course
I have, it’s the first thing that pops out when I go online. Anyway, I really
like your latest masterpiece- your strokes are getting better. Good job! But
maybe it’s time for you to make your work sell in the market. It’s kind of slow
selling them online don’t you think?” Amar seems to be considering my
suggestion but shrug it off.</span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “Naaah, man. I don’t think it’s ready
yet. You have to remember that we live in a society that doesn’t really
appreciate art like we do, have to give it some time first. In the mean time,
I’m trying to expand my market online, reaching to the right crowds and mingle
with the right people. Expanding my connections, you know what I mean?” He
explains. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> I nod exaggeratingly. “Oh wow, pretty
smart for a lazy bum.” I make an impressed face and give him an evil laugh as
he punches me on the shoulder in return. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Amar is smart, intelligent even. But he’s
just really lazy. Like sky high lazy. I remember having to tutor him for math
and science. He understands and gets them really fast but he’s just too lazy to
do the exercises and his homework. Even if the teachers gave him some projects
to do at home, he wouldn’t even lift a finger. That’s how lazy he is. But, come
to think of it. He’s just lazy doing things that he doesn’t like. But for his
paintings, he would travel thousand miles to meet his clients or to buy some
supplies. That’s how Amar is.</span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “Shut
up Adam. I know I’m not like you. I’m not even as good looking as you. I’m just
a no use lazy bum who feeds only on his mothers’ salary” Sulks Amar.</span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Man, this guy can really act. I just ignore
his remarks and continue enjoying my cappuccino. He’ll get around soon. I know
he’s not even serious at all; it’s just that I have a thing against self-pity.
Even though he’s just joking, I will not encourage that kind of jokes because I
believe in “everything you say is a prayer” So better not talk nonsense because
it might come true in the future. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">After we have done chatting and making
fun of each other, we drop by Al-Ikhsan on the way home to browse for sport
shoes. It really took me by surprise knowing that Amar is on the school’s football
team. I’m really happy for him because he is finally doing something normal for
a change- for a sixteen year old boy that is. What I’m more impressed is how
impeccable Anya’s persuasive skills are to have managed to make someone like
Amar to get off his butt and run laps around the field. Good job Anya! And I’m
pretty sure that Amar will succeed in whatever it is that he does. I can tell
that he has potentials. But like I said before, he is one big lazy bum!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">**************************************************</span></div>
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> The house is- as usual- empty as I
park my car in the garage. As I step into my house, suddenly it’s like the
sunshine had been taken away. Everything seems to be gloomy again. What’s up
with this? Seriously, I don’t really understand. This is one of the reasons why
I never invite friends over. This door, in front of me is a separation line, a
boundary; the line between my world and the world outside. I live in two
different worlds where I am two different people but somehow, I am still- Me. In
my own home, I feel like a total stranger where I am just here. I just exist,
like there is no life. But outside, I am alive. I see people, I meet people, I
am the person that I ought to be and my life here, in my own three storey home
is just a nightmare. But, right now, at this moment, as I stare out the opened
door, I feel like my life outside, in the world where everything is bright and
lively, is just a dream.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sounds
dramatic? Well that’s how dramatic my life is. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> A few seconds have passed and I start to
feel like an idiot standing there alone while staring at the opened door.
Shheesshh! Pathetic. So I climb up the stairs to my room. Ohh heaven on earth.
I jump on my comfy bed. Ohh so fluffy. I close my eyes; trying to enjoy the
bounciness of the bed. Suddenly out of nowhere, Anya’s face pop into my head
and before I know it, a smile helplessly appears upon my face. A feeling that I
couldn’t understand and I doubt that even the ‘Love Guru’ could enlighten me
and bring me out of the dark. I don’t know how to define this feeling. This is
why I hate being a teenager- All confusion and no confidence. So immature. I am
aware of everything that I’m going through but somehow I’m clueless at the same
time. So I guess I should accept the fact that the matter of the heart is
uncontrollable; the matter of Anya, is unreachable; As simple as macaroni and
cheese.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>“Adam”
An unexpected voice calls for me just outside the door. God, I forgot to lock
the door. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>“What
the..?” I exclaim quietly.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Dad? That’s weird. I thought he’s at
work. He never misses work. But then I notice the paleness of his face and how
he looks so haggard and messy; He’s sick. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>“What
is it dad? You’re sick? Do you want to see a doctor?” How ironic. A doctor is
going to see a doctor. But he says nothing and just comes into the opened door
and sits next to me. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>“Son,
why are you so against being a doctor?” He suddenly asks. This is really
unexpected. He caught me off guard. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “Oh dad, please, not again” I sigh while
trying to sit up.</span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “Yes, again. I really don’t understand.
You would be an excellent doctor; it’s in your blood.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “In my blood? Dad, I don’t want to hear
how it is <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">my destiny</i> or being a
doctor runs in the <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">family. </i>What’s
wrong with being a teacher anyway? It’s a noble job and I..” Before I could
explain, he raises his voice in protest. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “I don’t want to hear it! A teacher?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There’s nothing wrong with being a teacher
but I don’t want <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">you </i>to be a teacher.
Can’t you see how good you are? I see how you work at our clinic. Even if it’s
only part time, you looked like a real doctor already.” He sighs deeply.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Can’t you be like Alyas?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He embraced his destiny and now look where
that got him; A neurosurgeon at the biggest private hospital in Malaysia”</span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I’m trying so hard to control this rage
that is building inside of me. I steady my breath, stand up and start to pace
back and forth slowly. I really hate it when he compares me with my older
brother which is a totally different case.</span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “Your brother had bring honor to the
family and he’d be disappointed if you..”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">That’s it! This is my limit. This is how
far I could go with my patience. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>“Honor?!
NO dad! It’s honorable because he earned a lot of money right? It’s honorable
to <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">you</i> because people look up to you
thinking that you had been a good father and a great mentor to him. But dad,
it’s honorable because he’s happy. That’s what <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">he</i> wanted to do. And what? Disappointed? I swear that he’s not
gonna be disappointed at all because he understands. He’ll accept it. But you
dad.. you…” My voice trails off. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Shaking my head like I was trying to deny
whatever it is that’s in my head. My tears sting my eyes and I run off before
he could reply. I cannot let him see any of these tears. I feel that he doesn’t
deserve it. As I run, I hear his voice shouting after me. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>“Don’t
you walk away from me, young man! I’m not finish.”</span><br />
</div>
<div style="border-bottom: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; border: none; mso-element: para-border-div; padding: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in;">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I
ignore him and go straight for the car. I need to get out of here. It’s
suffocating.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">********************************************************</span></div>
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I’m not sure why but suddenly today, I
feel like sleeping all day. It’s not because the subject is boring or anything-
I just feel like getting out of school and forget about SPM. There’s too much
pressure- even for a book worm like me. I stare blankly at the English teacher
only to see last weeks’ fight with dad. I have not spoken or even seen him
since that big fight. He’s been busy with work and I’m busy with my SPM
preparation along with work at the clinic. Does anybody else feel this
stressful as I am or is it just me? </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>I
sigh sharply and look out the window. Then, I sit up in a slight shock with a
smile on my face. What a pleasant surprise- There’s Anya. On the field. I
didn’t expect her to be on the field early today. How lucky can I be to get a
class- a seat for that matter right next to the school field? I get to see Anya
and Amar running around chasing balls all evening. This is the only way for me
to see them since I have no time to actually hang out. Oh how I miss them. Oh!
There! I just realized something. Anya’s wearing that pink shoe that I bought
for her from Al-Ikhsan. So cute. Amar told me at the café back then about
Anya’s feet and about her old sport shoes. So, I did what I always do..</span><br />
</div>
<div style="border-bottom: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; border: none; mso-element: para-border-div; padding: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in;">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">****************************************************</span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; tab-stops: 168.85pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> Alright, today is the day. I must go and
see dad. It’s very important. Amar needs me. It’s about his mother and he
really needs my help so I can’t make this as an excuse to not help him. That
would be stupid. He only has his mother so…suddenly I feel sad as mum’s face
enters my mind..STOP! I took a deep breath, pull myself together and make my
way into the hospital. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; tab-stops: 168.85pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> There’s dad! I run to him. He’s holding a
clipboard- must be his patient’s particulars. He seems quite surprise to see
me- No doubt.</span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; tab-stops: 168.85pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “Dad, you got a minute? I need to talk to
you. It’s important.” My voice is shaky. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; tab-stops: 168.85pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “I’m busy.” I can see that he’s still
mad.</span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; tab-stops: 168.85pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “Dad please, it’s Amar’s mum, we think
that she might be sick but we don’t know for sure. There are symptoms but we…”
Like always, he would cut in.</span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; tab-stops: 168.85pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “Son, why don’t you go ask the teachers,
they might have all of the answers for you” He says that with ease. Dad sure is
the king of sarcasm. He’s beginning to turn away.</span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; tab-stops: 168.85pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “Dad! PLEASE! Just. Listen. To me.” I
almost shout the words out. I stand there on the hallway staring at him with
all tears in my eyes. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; tab-stops: 168.85pt; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I’m just so
exhausted. I can’t keep on living like this. He’s my father and I am his son.
He’s the only parent that I have left. I refuse to have this kind of
relationship with him. That’s not how it’s supposed to be. He stares at me for
quite a while and people are starting to take interest in our little scene. He
sighs and pulls me out into the hospital garden just a few steps away from
where we stood just now. It’s quite far from the crowd and also the patients so
it should be okay. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-left: .5in; tab-stops: 168.85pt; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “Okay
then, let’s hear it” he says slowly with his hands on his waist. I take a deep
breath before I begin.</span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; tab-stops: 168.85pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “I’m sorry dad, if me wanting to be a
teacher offends you so. But you <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">inspired</i>
me to be one, dad. You taught me a lot and I feel that even a great doctor like
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">you</i> used to have a good teacher to
inspire and teach you to become as great as you are now. Well, dad, I want to be
like that- to teach people things that <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">you</i>
have taught me and change their lives.” My voice shakes as tears fall down my
face. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; tab-stops: 168.85pt; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I can see the
tears in his eyes as well. He breathes in deeply; like he’s breathing in every
single word that I said and let out a long sigh; like he had finally understood.
It looks like he’s trying to find the right words to say. While he’s taking his
time, I feel like waiting for a test result or something. Hoping I didn’t fail. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; tab-stops: 168.85pt; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> His face
becomes calm and says coolly, “So, what are the symptoms?”</span><br />
</div>
<div style="border-bottom: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; border: none; mso-element: para-border-div; padding: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in;">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; tab-stops: 168.85pt; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I almost scream from this joy and relief that’s
bursting inside me. I step forward and hug him tightly. I feel like I’m a
little boy again. I feel like I have been set free and like flying and soaring
in the clouds. It’s liberating. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; tab-stops: 168.85pt; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; tab-stops: 168.85pt; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">******************************************************</span></div>
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; tab-stops: 168.85pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> Dad said there’s a possibility for a
tumor or a cancer. It was not for sure because Aunty had to go in for a checkup
first. It’s best if she goes in earlier. But I guess now it’s too late. Amar
just called me saying that Aunty had passed out and was sent to the emergency
room. Turns out she has a brain tumor. I’m racing towards the emergency room
and see Amar and Anya on the hall way. Then I see dad walking out of the room.
I run to him to ask about Aunty.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; tab-stops: 168.85pt; text-align: justify;">
<br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> Then I realize something, today is the
big day. Today’s amar’s big football tournament. Oh God, how hard it must be on
him. I approach him and give him a pat as an encouragement.</span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> “It’s okay Amar, Anya and I will take
good care of her. My dad said that her condition is stable now. Go and win that
tournament. I’m sure that’s what she wanted you to do. Don’t you think?” I say
with a soft smile. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> Hopefully he’ll feel better knowing that
we got his back and that everything is going to be just fine. At the same time,
I feel goosebumps just by standing next to Anya and knowing that we’ll be alone
when Amar’s gone. I gulp. My heart is beating so fast and so hard against my
ribs that I began to worry that she might hear them. Then on that split second,
our eyes met. DDDUUMMMM!!!! DDDDUUMMMM!!!! I feel like the lighting had struck
me- Can she actually hear them? I swallow a big lump of saliva nervously. This
is going to be a long night. </span></div>
<div style="border-bottom: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; border: none; mso-element: para-border-div; padding: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in;">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">**************************************************</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> It has been an interesting year this
year. SPM went on well and I’m glad that’s over with. I feel like a huge load had
been lifted off of my shoulders. Dad and I are doing better. It’s great to have
broken down that big thick wall between us. Now, it’s like nothing had gone
wrong before, just like when I was young. Just like when mum was around. I
guess we both had learned our lesson. Next week, I’m going to the city with dad
to help him around at one of our clinics. They are short of hands so I’m just
going to lend some. Dad even said that this is a good opportunity for me to
gain new experiences to share with my students in the future. I’m glad that
he’s giving me his full support in my ambition now. </span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> Aunty is recovering well. It’s fortunate
that it was a minor tumor so it’s still could be treated. I’m happy for Amar
because of his loss in the tournament. Don’t get me wrong, I’m sorry for him
and all. I’m just happy that he has found his remedy other than paintings. Anya and I on the other hand… ahem… well,
let’s say that something great had happened. Like a miracle or something.
Somehow that night- at the hospital, I’ve decided to write her a letter;
something that I would have never imagined doing, telling her about how I feel
and also come clean about how I was the one who had been secretly giving her things
when she needs them. I was afraid to tell her that, not knowing how she would
react, but like I said, miracle. We’re not actually together, but things had
definitely changed for the better.</span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> Now we’re all meeting at the café before
I leave next week. It has been a long time since we’ve gathered together. It
feels really good and I can’t wait to have a taste of my iced caramel
cappuccino. CIAO! </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">END </span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY" style="font-size: large;"><u><b> Touch; Amar Zamani</b></u></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br clear="ALL" style="mso-ignore: vglayout;" /></span>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">Sorry mom, I have to go </span></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><s><span lang="EN-MY">I’ll be back soon</span></s></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><s><span lang="EN-MY">I’ll be okay</span></s></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">I love you.</span></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Zamani</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">To be free is like flying and
soaring up on the sky, touching the cloud and feel the wind kissing you gently.
It is simply intoxicating you will never trade it for something else.</span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> To be free also means to be
lost. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">You don’t know where to stop,
when to rest, who you belong to.</span></span></div>
<div style="border-bottom: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; border: none; mso-element: para-border-div; padding: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in;">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">At least that’s how I feel.</span></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">I was born with parents, but I
was raised by a parent; mom. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">She is my joy and sorrow; my
everything. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">Dad?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He’s a guy who craved freedom. He got it. And
I hope he is free to his doom.</span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">Friends? I don’t have any but
two; Adam and Anya. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">Anya is my strength; she sees
within me things that I never saw, she kicks me at the back when I feel like
giving up and she stands beside me when I feel estranged. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">Adam is my conscience, he
guides me when I’m lost, he saves me when I drown and he pats me on the back
when I succeed. </span></span></div>
<div style="border-bottom: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; border: none; mso-element: para-border-div; padding: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in;">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">They really deserve the title.
They are no hypocrites as the rest of them are.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">I am only 16 years old, and I
know I’m living the dream of so many people. Since I was little, I was given
the freedom to choose what I want, to be who I am, to do what I like, all
thanks to mom. With mom, it is always like this;</span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> “Mom, I don’t like my name. It
sounds old fashioned. Can my friends call me something else?”</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> ‘They could call you….Amar!
That’s nice isn’t it?’ she said.<br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> “Mom, I really like the
paintings!”</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> ‘We could go to the Art Gallery
again next Sunday darling’ she said.</span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> “Mom, I can draw the painting
we saw!”</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> ‘Let me buy you an easel
darling’ she said.</span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> “Mom, I think art is my ‘thing’”</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> ‘You could join art classes if
you want darling’, she said.</span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> “Mom, I sell some of my
paintings online.”</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> ‘Good for you darling’ she
said.</span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> “Mom, I’ll be out a little
bit. I’m delivering some paintings to my customer.”</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> ‘Okay, be careful darling’ she
said.</span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> “Mom, I’ll be late tonight.
Please have your dinner first”</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> ‘It’s okay. I’ll wait for you
darling’ she said.</span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">You see. Total freedom. But,
deep inside, there is a question that keeps on bugging me.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">Am I doing what I want? Am I
being myself? Am I choosing the right thing? </span></span></div>
<div style="border-bottom: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; border: none; mso-element: para-border-div; padding: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in;">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">I guess these are some of the
unwanted parts of the freedom package. Uncertainty.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">********** </span></span></span></div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I never like sport nor do sport or even watch
sport. I am too lazy to even think about the benefit of sport. But, somehow,
Anya had managed to persuade me into joining sport. Football, to be exact. You
see, I always see myself as someone who preferred to be indoor rather than outdoor.
I’m not lazy, but the idea of getting all sweaty and stink does not tempt me at
all. I rather draw a drain hole than taking shower thrice a day. Too much time
wasted on showering activity.</span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> However it is, here I am.
Standing in line for the school football team final selection’s try out. I
swear, I never intended to go this far. I’m pretty sure I would never nail this
round. The previous selection’s round must had been full of real losers I
suppose. Or else, I won’t be standing here.</span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">Oh, the coach is calling me.
It’s my turn now. Here I go!</span></span></div>
<div style="border-bottom: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; border: none; mso-element: para-border-div; padding: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in;">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> “Zamani!” Do I hear that
right? Is that my name he’s calling? God. I’m an official member of the
school’s football team! What did I do wrong?</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">********** </span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> A good dose of caffeine has
the magic to lift you up from the ground of all sorrows. Although Adam said
that only his Caramel Cappuccino could give that kind of effect, I knew better.
Nothing could beat the sensation of a hot and smoky cup of Café Latte. It could
help you grow a pair of wings on your back and make you fly, even.</span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> This is the spot that we used
to hang out; Adam, Anya and I. Anya is not really a coffee person but she joins
us here anyway. We talked about our life, jokes around and just having a good
time. Most of the time, Anya would not join us as she had to take care of her
little siblings. But, I meet her every day at school.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Adam is taking SPM this year, so we rarely bump
into each other at school. I believe he needs to be busy with studying like
other SPM candidates do. Thus, it has been quite some time since we could hang
out like this. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">Where’s that fella? Oh. There
he is. </span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> “Dude! Do you know how long
I’ve been waiting for you? Why don’t you just come by next year while you’re at
it?” </span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">Such sissy. It is not like a
thousand years had passed or something, it is just an hour and a half. Anyway,
I better put my sorry-I-am-late-I-would-never-do-it-again face. That will cheer
him up a bit.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">See? With Adam, it works every
time! Haha. I feel kind of guilty though, to make this kind-hearted creature to
wait for me. But, it is not my fault that cute cat suddenly rested on my window
sill. She is so cute I couldn’t resist sketching her.</span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">Anyway, as I sipped my coffee,
I naturally tell Adam about what Anya and I had been up to. The football
selection, the coach’s moustache that keep on dancing when he speaks, Anya’s
usual trouble with the girls’ football team and some other stuff. I also did
mention something about Anya complaining that her feet hurt recently. It must be
due to her haggard shoes, I told Adam. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">The thing with Adam is, he
always has this mysterious aura lingering all around him. It took me quite some
time to figure out what kind of person this guy is. He’s very discreet even
though he’s filthy rich (he doesn’t know I knew) and he is so thoughtful he
never fails in helping his friend who is in need. I hope he could open up to us
a little but he must have his own reason for not doing so. Hence, I better not
make an issue out of it. </span></span></div>
<div style="border-bottom: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; border: none; mso-element: para-border-div; padding: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in;">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">Even now as I am speaking to
him about Anya, he got that thoughtful look on his face. Okay, now he wants to
go to Al-Ikhsan after this. I could kinda guess what is in his mind somehow..</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">********** </span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> The football practice went
superbly well. I never knew this but somehow I do like football! Football also
has its very own ‘art’ of playing. Who knows I could actually relate my passion
for art and use it for some other different things? </span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> Oh yeah, two weeks from now my
team will be joining the most prestigious football tournament of all. Every top
teams from high schools all over the nation will be there and the grand prize
of this tournament are 7 full sport’s scholarship for the best team. I don’t
really need the scholarship but most of my fellow teams really need it to
further their studies at the tertiary level. So, this championship is very
important to be won. Thanks Anya, if you had never
forced me into this, I’ll never realise my own hidden ability. Hmm. Better treat
her later. </span></span><br />
</div>
<div style="border-bottom: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; border: none; mso-element: para-border-div; padding: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in;">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> Speak of the devil! There she
is, busy doing the warm ups before the football practice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">I had known Anya since, hmm..
I couldn’t remember! I feel like I had befriended her since forever. Look at
her, once a boyish girl who likes to tease me around, messing with my head
(literally), and always picking a fight (not that she loses the habit now) had
somehow in the blink of an eye turn rather.. How should I put it? Womanly?
Haha. I feel like vomiting hearing my own thoughts. </span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> Nevertheless, yeah, I admit
she had turned prettier as we grow up. Look at her hair, for example, no more
bob-style and messy. It was quite nice to see her long, wavy hair tied in a
ponytail.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Well, at least guys see her as
a girl despite of all her boyish interests (or obsession, I might say) in
football and sports. </span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> You see, Anya is not like the
other regular girls. She hardly shows any girly weaknesses or over-sensitivity.
She’s one cool girl, in simpler term. But, being the eldest child in a family
that suffer financial aid like drinking water, it must be hard for her to have
some time for herself. She had supressed everything inside I wonder how long
would it takes until she break. </span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">She never did.</span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s why I stayed besides her all this
while, I suppose. All I could offer her is my support if she needs me.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">Ooof! When did she approach
me? Sheesh. She messed up my hair again. Just you wait, Anya! </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><span lang="EN-MY"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">********** </span></span> </span></span></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> Mom is quite quiet these past
few weeks. Or is it just me? I am frequently out due to football practice, art
classes and some other stuffs, I hardly talk or eat together with mom. When I
asked, she did say she’s okay and that she is having minor headache from work.
I did offer doing some massage or anything but she refuses and asked me to go
do what I want to. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">Somehow, I feel like I’m a
balloon that is floating freely towards the sky when all I hope was being touched
and hold by a hand so that I feel needed and happy. </span></span><br />
</div>
<div style="border-bottom: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; border: none; mso-element: para-border-div; padding: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in;">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">Perhaps I could ask Adam about
this. His father is a doctor. He must know something about mom’s problem.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">********** </span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I KNOW something is not right with her. Even
Adam mentioned about the possibilities of various diseases. Not to forget how
Adam actually lectured me for not taking good care of my own mother. Well, I
did try didn’t I?</span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> But, couldn’t she just
straight tell me what’s wrong and not trying to pretend as if everything is
okay when it’s not? This is one of the things that don’t make sense to me at
all. Why should people pretend and hide the truth from someone they care for
with lame excuses like ‘I won’t tell them in order not to hurt them’? It is all
rubbish! Sooner or later, the truth will be out and that person will know and
he or she will be hurt no matter what. So, why delay it? </span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">Somehow, inwardly, I snapped. </span></span></div>
<div style="border-bottom: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; border: none; mso-element: para-border-div; padding: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in;">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> What I do next is the
stupidest thing I could ever do in my entire life. I rebel. I refuse to talk to
mom and I even avoid her whenever I’m home. If she could pretend that she’s
okay and better off without my help, then I could also pretend the same thing. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">Moreover, my huge football
tournament is tomorrow. Better focus on that.</span></span><br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> </span><span lang="EN-MY"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">********** </span></span></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> The last time I met her was
this morning. When she tried to talk to me about something and I refused to
listen as I quickly went out to school. She’s tough and independent (like how
she pretended to be). If she has any problem of course she could figure out the
solution later. </span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">At least, that’s what I
thought. </span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> Now, here she is, lying
helplessly in the emergency room. Surrounded by all the doctors and nurses. So
much for being an Iron lady. So much for pretending to be one.</span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">‘Crack, crack, crack’</span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> The cracking sound is so
intense. I think it’s the sound of my ego. It’s crumbling to the floor with,
what’s this? Tears? I never streaked even a single tear before! Not even when
the rest of the kids in the kindergarten isolated me because I had this thing
called autism. Not even when they called me a ‘retard’. Not even when dad left.
Not even when I got to know he left because he wanted to be free of all the
burdens my ‘specialty’ gave him. Not even when I saw mom heartbreakingly plead
him not to go. Not even when I heard her cried in her sleep. </span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> This is new. I could even hear
my inner conscience swearing to me for being ridiculously stupid to even
consider neglecting my mom; my everything. Now, she might leave me forever!
Mom, I’m so sorry. Please wake up and say that you forgive this lazy,
ungrateful and stupid son of yours! Please mom… don’t leave me too..</span></span></div>
<div style="border-bottom: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; border: none; mso-element: para-border-div; padding: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in;">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">The tears keep on flowing down
my cheek and I don’t know how to make it stop.</span></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> I feel two hands patting me,
comforting me. Of course I recognized these hands in a heartbeat. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> “Amar, let me take care of
her. Go, now. I know you have to” Anya small hand patting my shoulder gently.</span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">Oh yeah, my tournament. My
huge football tournament.</span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> “It’s okay Amar, Anya and I
will take good care of her. My dad said that her condition is stable now. Go
and win that tournament. I’m sure that’s what she wanted you to do. Don’t you
think?” Adam large hand pats me on the back firmly.</span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">Obviously. If mom is fully
awake, she must have scream and chased me out to go join the tournament. She
always wanted me to do what’s best for me.</span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> “Take good care of her will
you. And when she’s awake, give this to her” I passed Adam a little note that I
scratched hurriedly before I go.</span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">You see, I do live in the life
dreamt by many. I have these guys who are always there through thick and thin.
They are my friends for eternity. And I have mom. You see, I have been wrong all
along. </span></span><br />
</div>
<div style="border-bottom: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; border: none; mso-element: para-border-div; padding: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in;">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> Mom did not pretend to be
strong, she is strong. She braced herself and gives me the freedom to do what I
want and go where I want. Of course she had been worried stiff if I was home
late or even if I got into trouble while travelling alone. But, she swallowed
all the pain and the worries in order to let me taste the freedom and learn
about the world in my own pace. She never forces me into anything and she let
me decide what I should do because she trusted me. She trusted me of being
capable to make a wise decision for myself. I, on the other hand, am the one
who failed to trust myself. </span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> All this while, I craved to be
touched, to be hold, so that I won’t get lost floating within the freedom
cosmos. Now, I finally realised, I am being hold dear by everyone dear to me. They do it without I even
realising it. All this while, I am being fully embraced by their love. How
could I be so blind and ignorant?</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: none; line-height: 150%; mso-border-bottom-alt: dotted windowtext 3.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in; padding: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">********** </span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> At the age of 16, I learned to
understand myself better and I learned to appreciate people around me as I
never had before. This is a memorable year if you ask me. So many things happen
I do not know where to begin.</span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> Yes. My mom is recovering just
fine. It is a benign tumour on her brain, that’s all and it had been removed
safely. No harms done. She is back to her chirpy self as always. I even
promised her not to be home late ever again and take care of her better in the
future. She rolled her eyes when I said it but she still hugged me tightly
after that.</span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> No. We lost the tournament.
But, one of my team-mate who is the best player among us had been selected the
best player and received the sport’s scholarship. We did not do too badly I
would say. Well, we did manage to go until the semi-final round, you know.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">Yes. My online painting shop
is open for business. I do want to get rid of most of these paintings I accumulated
for the past few days. Too many cute cats and kittens had been resting on my
window sill. </span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"> Yes. Adam and Anya are pretty
much alive. Something is definitely up with the two of them, I could feel it!
Hmm.. Something must have happened at the hospital when I was gone, I suppose. Well,
whatever. It is better if Anya is with Adam than she is with some unknown
losers. At least, I KNOW this loser very well. Haha. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: left;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">Oh! There they <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">are. </span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"></span>We are hanging out for the
last time (at our usual port; the café) because Adam is going to help his dad
and living somewhere in the city for a few months. It will be a while until we
could actually hang out together again, I think. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">So, got to go now. Ciao!</span></span><br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">(Oh, the new waitress is very
pretty indeed. I wonder if she’s single.) </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-MY">END</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">__________________________________________________________________</span></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">Authors; </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">Look: Dini fareha</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">Listen: Liyana Johari</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">Touch: Maryam Zamberi </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 50.15pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">This is our creative project for semester 3: Literature for Children and Young Adults. We got ourselves into the young adult's literature and this what we had came up with. </span></span></div>
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<![endif]--><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6109504078057431591.post-3293476523948475172012-06-17T04:11:00.001-07:002012-06-17T04:31:31.099-07:00Lappy:: Mungkin boleh.<div style="text-align: justify;">
Petang ini dia berjalan lagi. Geraknya perlahan dan kepalanya tertunduk. Aku, seperti biasa, tepat pada pukul empat petang akan terpacak di atas balkoni rumah ini. Semata-mata untuk melihat dia. Dia yang aneh. Dia yang misteri. Dia yang penuh tanda tanya. Dia yang penuh derita gamaknya. Dia yang sangat menarik perhatian aku.</div>
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Aku selalu bayangkan satu situasi dimana aku akan buat-buat baca buku sambil berjalan dan dengan sengaja nya buat tidak sengaja melanggar dia. Dengan itu, mungkin kami akan berkenalan dan mulakan sesuatu yang baru. ATAU, atau, mungkin, mungkin aku akan terus pergi kepada dia dan memberikan satu senyuman manis dan belanja dia makan aiskrim? </div>
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Lebih senang untuk aku terus berangan seperti ini dari memalukan diri sendiri. Tetapi, tetapi sesungguhnya dia sangat misteri. Sesungguhnya dia sangat menarik hati.</div>
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<br /></div>
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Keesokan harinya aku berasa hampa kerana setelah pun pukul lima, kelibat dia masih tidak kelihatan. Tetapi aku tetap menunggu. Selepas tiga hari aku tetap menunggu. Pelik. Aneh. Aku dah jadi 'stalker'.</div>
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Walaupun telah lima hari tidak nampak banyangan dia yang misteri itu, aku tetap kaluar ke balkoni tepat pukul empat petang-- kerana kebiasaan. Tetapi daripada mencari kelibat dia, aku belajar semula untuk melihat keindahan taman dihadapan rumah aku. Aku rasakan kenikmatan angin yang bertiup sepoi-sepoi bahasa. Aku melihat langit yang membiru dan melihat burung-burung berterbangan. Aku teringat kembali sebab sebenar aku keluar ke balkoni itu. Aku rasa kehilangan dan rasa malu. Tidak sangka aku begitu leka dan obses melihat satu keindahan sehinggakan aku lupa tentang keindahan yang lagi gah. </div>
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Aku rasa gembira kerana aku kembali rasa tenang. Aku tahu tujuan aku dan aku tahu apa yang aku mahu. Ciptaan yang maha Esa yang indah dan menenangkan ini telah mengajar aku untuk bersyukur, cara ini atau yang lain. Memang rezeki aku gamaknya. </div>
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<br /></div>
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Aku mula untuk keluar dan menyeberangi jalan. Setelah sekian lama, aku akhirnya jejak semula kaki ke taman itu. Aku berjalan, aku berfikir, aku melihat, aku menikmati, aku menghirup udara segar. Waahhh.. sesungguhnya aku telah lupa. </div>
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<br /></div>
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Hilaian tawa kanak-kanak membuat aku berfikir kembali tentang zaman kanak-kanak aku. Kami sekawan berlari dan ketawa, kami jatuh dan terus ketawa. Zaman mengenal dunia tanpa kesedihan. Begitu manis sekali. Aku ketawa kecil dan *TTTAAAANNNGGG!!*</div>
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<br /></div>
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"Aduuhhh!!!!" </div>
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Arrgghh,, sakitnya kepala aku. Dalam keadaan terduduk aku mengaduh. Kepala aku terasa sakit sangat.</div>
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Dengan perlahan aku cuba untuk bangun dan menstabilkan diri....</div>
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"Awak tak apa-apa ke?" </div>
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Sebujur wajah yang sangat aku kenali berada betul-betul dihadapan mataku. Si dia yang misteri! Si dia yang menarik hati! Wah, jantung aku!!<br />
<br />
"Apa yang awak fikirkan tu sampai tiang lampu pun tak nampak?" </div>
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Tanya dia lagi. Mukanya yang kelihatan seperti menahan tawa aku tenung. Hamboi, terkelu terus lidah aku. </div>
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"Err.. haha. Awak nampak ke?" </div>
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Aduh, segannya aku. </div>
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"Susah untuk tak nampak, tetapi selalunya awak berdiri di atas balkoni tu je. Dah lama awak tak jalan-jalan kat taman ni. Rindu eh?" </div>
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Begitu yakin dia keluarkan pernyataan. Kejap! apa dia kata? Mana dia tahu? Selama ni dia tengok aku jugak ke? Apakah semua ini? </div>
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Aku terdiam lagi.</div>
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"Awak okay tak ni? macam weng-weng je saya tengok" </div>
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Dia yang misteri itu ketawa. Wah, manis nya. Baik nya. </div>
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"Okay, okay, saya okay. Terima kasih"</div>
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Dengan janggalnya aku mengangguk-anggukkan kepala. Apa aku nak buat ni, aku dah lama 'plan' benda macam ni, tapi bila dah betul-betul jadi, aku gagap pulak. Cuak pula aku rasa. Aku terasa muka aku mula panas.</div>
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"Bagus lah awak okay. Kuat jugak awak terhantuk tadi. Jom lah, saya belanja awak aiskrim kat sana tu"<br />
Sekuntum senyuman diberikan kepada aku. Tanpa aku sedari, aku juga tersenyum dan menganggukkan kepala.</div>
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Heemm.. satu permulaan yang baru.</div>
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Memang rezeki aku gamaknya. </div>
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<b>SOME LOVE YAAAWWW:</b><br />
Assalamualaikum. Hai, lama kan tak jenguk blog ni kan?<br />
Aku rasa aku tak perlu kot untuk terangkan pasal cerita ni, semua dah besar dan dah pandai untuk berfikir. Bacalah, fikirlah sendiri apakah maksud disebalik cerita ini. Setiap orang mempunyai pendapat masing-masing dan tiada yang betul dan salah disini. </div>
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<br /></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6109504078057431591.post-69245571313393524282012-02-18T11:02:00.003-08:002012-02-18T11:07:12.476-08:00Thought:: 2If we don't imagine, what will make our dream?<br />If we don't dream, what will make our future?<br />If we don't hope, will we have a future?<br /><br />does that make sense?Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6109504078057431591.post-27063412334003047132011-06-20T22:17:00.000-07:002011-06-20T22:26:24.184-07:00Thought:: 1No matter how far you will go or how far you've come, there will always be someone to turn to. The thing is, you don't have to do everything on your own.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6109504078057431591.post-83581771530703100032011-06-20T22:15:00.000-07:002011-06-20T22:16:30.263-07:00LittleGreenNoteBook:: Please be kindDear rainbow<br />please be kind<br />don't fade away<br />don't make me wait for another rain<br />and the sun to yet shine again<br /><br />Dear wind<br />please be kind<br />don't blow my time away<br />I'm yet to use them someday<br />just to relive those days<br /><br />Dear little heart<br />please be kind<br />don't cry don't shatter<br />make neither sound nor whisper<br />surely they would hear you<br />even when you are silent<br /><br />Dear people<br />please be kind<br />smile even when the rainbow leaves you in black and white<br />do something- anything even if seconds is all you have<br />speak up when you can- don't let your heart suffer when it has yet so much to offer<br /><br />Dear people<br />Please be kindUnknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6109504078057431591.post-39196605172323857142011-05-28T03:07:00.000-07:002011-05-28T03:07:00.824-07:00Life :: 27<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">I don't care what took me here. I only care about where I'm going.</span><br />
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</span>freeze 2 farrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00757843797778640553noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6109504078057431591.post-19589912138761099892011-03-31T02:49:00.000-07:002011-03-31T03:35:58.363-07:00LittleGreenNoteBook::Teruskan Lagi<span class="Apple-style-span" >Di dalam diam aku petik gitar--</span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >bunyi nya hambar</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >mencari kata dan irama</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >semuanya tidak seiring</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >semuanya tidak sama</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >terasa hilang</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >gundah gulana</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >ke sana ke mari aku cuba mencari erti</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >apa yang aku ragui aku diamkan saja</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >sedapkan hati</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Terus diam dan teruskan lagi</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >hidup harus diteruskan</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >walau alunan musika berlainan genre</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >makna nya tetap sama</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >cuma berlainan rasa</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Mari gubah lagu sekarang dan akan datang</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >melainkan memegang lagu yang melodi nya suatu ketika dahulu</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >dan menarik kita jatuh tidak berdiri lagi.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><b>SOME LOVE:</b> Dimana kau melihat seseorang itu kuat dan tabah, ada sesuatu yang telah menjadikan dia jatuh dan menyebabkan dia untuk bangun semula dengan kekuatan yang ada dan teruskan tanpa menyesal apa apa. waaahhh,,, panjang nya! apa entah yang dibebelkan? :P</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Baiklah, entri kali ini di catatkan dalam bahasa Melayu, maaf jika ini melanggar peraturan Incerto--(ada ke? hmm.. :/) haha. </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><b>THE BREAK DOWN!!!:</b> Nukilan ini adalah hasil dari tamatnya hidup sebagai pelajar Asasi Tesl di UiTM. Ramai yang meluahkan rasa sedih, rindu dan sebagainya kepada rakan rakan mereka. Aku agak tawar hati kerana tak berapa gemar nak fikir banyak banyak tentang perkara ni. Sebab kita secara tak sengaja akan terasa dan terfikir jugak pasal benda ni dan tak guna untuk 'make a big deal out of it' sebab ia tidak akan mengubahkan apa apa. </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Sekarang sudah terasa lain. apa yang kita buat semua rasa lain. 'Things are changing and it won't be the same' perasaan pun berubah, orang berubah. mungkin dengan mengetahui tentang fakta ini orang menjadi takut dengan kehilangan kenangan indah yang dulu. tapi jika kita melayan perasaan ini dan terlalu kerap berfikir tentang nya, bila kita nak hidup? bila mahu gerak ke hadapan jika berpegang pada yang silam? </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Jadi, bukalah mata pada yang sekarang dan yang akan datang- tapi tak bermakna yang lepas itu dilepaskan. Hanya simpan di dalam hati- menjadi pangalaman yang indah untuk kita dan belajar dari nya :)</span></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6109504078057431591.post-72915351760119343482011-03-11T09:56:00.000-08:002011-03-11T10:35:34.456-08:00Welcoming Lee Joe, and everything that comes with her package... lol This might just be one of the <s>least</s> heart touching narrative I've ever written in 39 years of my life. I was a lonely person, one without a companion. Lonely, because I told people I was never lonely being alone. People who really don't feel lonely never say such things. That is the difference between a heartless person and a normal human. The loneliness crept inside me, like a caterpillar, but with the vibe of a python, slowly wrapping around me, suffocating me, killing me. And in my loneliness, I find a companion in my writing. In fact, I couldn't think of anything else that I have, except my writing. Without it I'll be worthless, a piece of non-existent trash (as useless as trash is, what kind of standard would it have when it is not even there?) So as to say, one day I hit a wall on a piece of writing. It was a little insignificant piece. a typical piece of man meets girl, man falls in love, and... that's when I hit a wall.<br />
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I couldn't think anymore. I couldn't imagine anything. I was stripped off my one and only happiness. my one and only friend. my only true possession. my writing.<br />
<br />
That was when life truly spit on my face (Not that I care. My face has no artistic value. Arghh again, I say I don't care, which shows that I really do. Damn). I started to wonder what use I had in this world - apart from being the non-existent trash. but even a trash like me needs to eat. So I went around, asking around for money, for mercy (O God I hate myself). everyday, I would get money from people of all colours. and everyday I would see the girl in green. everyday, I would get money from people of all colours, but everyday I would not get money from the girl in green. Everyday I would get pity from all colours, but never from her. The Girl in Green. She is always there, looking at me, but she does nothing.<br />
<br />
Except, she would write in her little green notebook everyday in front of me. she would write, her face emotionless. And such a routine went on quite a while until one day she wasn't there anymore. I thought I was already washed off any human emotion, but with her disappearance I felt... something. And so I searched for her. I looked everywhere until I found her, on the roof of a building I had no knowing of. And she looked at me. But I was not satisfied. It wasn't her that I needed to see. It was something else. That's when I realized. Writing! I need to see her write! I want to know what she writes about. what she puts in that little green notebook of hers. I want to read everything she wrote.<br />
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That's when she smiled, and said that she couldn't write anymore. she hit a wall, and now she doesn't know what to do. I told her that it's alright, you should try writing again. But she only shrugged, and said,<br />
<br />
"What about you? Why won't you write?"<br />
<br />
It hit me like thunder. All of a sudden, all of my feelings towards my writing, all my passion, it erupted up inside me. With this girl... With this girl... I want to write again! Afterwards we got together, and we write, and with her, all my unfinished, insignificant stories became significant, they became perfect, and for that I make it my life goal to keep her little green notebook alive.<br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #660000; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">AUTHOR'S NOTE : WELCOME LEE JOE as an author in Incerto~!!! If u guys havent known her, Lee Joe (LJ for short), is an inspiring writer with a heart. From now on she'll be writing up posts here in Incerto, and you can get to her line of work here: <a href="http://freeze2farris-incerto.blogspot.com/search/label/LJ">LJ PUNYA KERJA</a> . Her work will also be labelled with "LJ", rather than mine, which will have a "F2F" label. Hee~ :D so that's that. Toodles guys~ n let's hope LJ will continue writing for the page, forever~ :p </span>freeze 2 farrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00757843797778640553noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6109504078057431591.post-37337589598842576122011-03-09T01:05:00.000-08:002011-03-09T01:24:18.066-08:00LittleGreenNoteBook:: It's not over yetHello there friend<div>Why do you look so sad?</div><div>Have the world got you down?</div><div>Well cheer up now, I'm here, put your chin up.</div><div><br /></div><div>Why dear friend?</div><div>Why are you crying?</div><div>Don't be like that now, it's not over yet</div><div>We still have the night to spend, don't ruin it all.<br /><br />I'm sorry friend, truly I am<br />I never meant to hurt you like I did<br />Is it possible for me to be forgiven?<br />For my mistakes, my misunderstandings and our little tears<br />Let's put it behind us, there's a lot more to be happy for.<br /></div><div><br /></div><div>Thank you friend thank you</div><div>For the smiles, the laughs, the hugs, the kisses</div><div>Ohh should I list them all?</div><div>Your wise words, your lending ears have saved me</div><div>Thank you friend thank you</div><div>For the memories.<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(204, 0, 0);">SOME LOVE:</span><span style="color: rgb(204, 0, 0);"> Hey y'all!! take that frown off your face, it'll make you look sexier. Aha! This is a poem for my big dinner that's coming up. I intend to perform this to all of my friends and show them how much they mean to me. Well, hope it goes well. Peace!:)</span><br /></div><div><br /></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6109504078057431591.post-80222773137725643742011-03-08T23:53:00.000-08:002011-03-08T23:53:16.961-08:00Poesia :: I am... The World. But without You I am Nothing. :P<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Flowers sway with the rythm, a colourful motion</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">The garden of life, a great scenery</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">A bird came by, flapping its wings</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">When another came around, singing.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">The voice of water, from a river nearby, flowing</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Dancing in my ears, oh so beautiful</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">A school of salmon, swimming in harmony</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Some leapt over the other, ever so pretty.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Everything was perfect, as I sat there staring</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Except there was still something, something still missing</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">And one was still amiss, the world knows who</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">The one who is not here, is definitely You.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b>If you are still not clear, I'll tell you what,</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b>It's just that I Love You, and you're all that I want.</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhT3wbzYL5ghvs7hG3zfEZaEMcZE4tSXJ33mUuHk92M5nUzrz5D_XzCWxz1lL94SmEss0FJJGPQ_wQRETB6_xypndjgx7ndk4wglBO6OPtfd3g4esesuFOr1TBDVdlM2ot-5fJf0FCyk964/s1600/37_tulips_beautiful_flowers_desktopwallpaper_s+-+Copy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="172" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhT3wbzYL5ghvs7hG3zfEZaEMcZE4tSXJ33mUuHk92M5nUzrz5D_XzCWxz1lL94SmEss0FJJGPQ_wQRETB6_xypndjgx7ndk4wglBO6OPtfd3g4esesuFOr1TBDVdlM2ot-5fJf0FCyk964/s640/37_tulips_beautiful_flowers_desktopwallpaper_s+-+Copy.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #660000;">AUTHOR'S NOTE: kahkahkah, I would never have remembered writing such (shake) lovey stuff. This was in Form 5, when a group of us challenged each other (who knew nothing of love) to write a love poem, one which IF, AND ONLY IF we had a girlfriend, we would give it to them. This was my product. *blush* Hee~ <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">:D</span> I'm not so refined in the poetic department, and thus you could definitely see a kind of 'awkward' vibe to the whole piece. But I do enjoy poetry, and writing sum more would be more than a pleasure, so expect more of 'em aite~? XD</span>freeze 2 farrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00757843797778640553noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6109504078057431591.post-47465259182760914012011-03-08T20:47:00.000-08:002011-03-08T20:47:32.796-08:00Solitary :: Fly, Ron, Fly<div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">Fly, Ron, fly.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"> Walk three blocks down the Arkwood village entrance, and you will find yourself mesmerized by what would seem as the widest, greenest, flawless grass field, stretching for miles and miles into the horizon. However, the land itself is not what makes it interesting, yet it is the continuous flow of wind from up South. With astonishing scenery and strong breezes, ‘The Great Meadow’, as locals would call it, is the most noticeable landmark of Arkwood, and one that puts the small village on the map as a kiting heaven. Thus, one would always be able to witness a magnificent kite show here, no matter what turn of the hour.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"> True, everyday groups and groups of kite fans would gather here, all with their kites flying high up in the air, colourful, graceful. Among such kite enthusiasts is a little boy, a local, Shawn. Every evening, one could expect Shawn to be at The Great Meadow, besides the large stone and under the large tree. But our story is not of this boy, oh no, but it is about his kite. Diamond-shaped, and coloured with bright yellow and chartreuse, it is a standard kite, made by Shawn’s deceased father. ‘Ron’ was its name. <o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"> Every evening, Ron would be flying, like all kites do. It floats, still, with the occasional sway of left to right, and right to left, but it floats there, above the large stone and besides the large tree, and continues floating there, still. Every evening, Ron could see the other kites, flying, like all kites do, but higher, with more graceful sways of left to right, and right to left, and they fly further, further away from the large stone and large tree. Every evening, Ron would want to be the same, it wants to fly higher, it wants to be free. <o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"> As such, one evening, Ron planned to escape from Shawn, from the large stone and large tree. It purposely stuck its string to the large tree, and it swayed, left to right, until the string finally snapped. Shawn looked helplessly as Ron flew higher and higher, swaying left to right, right to left, away from him, away from the large stone and large tree, and away from The Great Meadow. Finally, Ron was happy. It flew higher than the rest of the kites and much further away. It was so happy that it did not care where he wet. He was free, that was what matters. <o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"> Days passed, and Ron finally reached another place. A place it knew nothing of. There were no trees, no grass, but there were stones. But these stones were nothing like the stones back in Arkwood. They were shaped in cubes. Large cubes of stone. High cubes of stone. And on the cubes were long metal horns. They were so long; Ron was occasionally stuck to them, restricted from flying. Then there was the rain. It rained and rained, until Ron became dull. It was not yellow anymore. Along with the rain came thunder, thunder which shook Ron with pain. It got scared. It was scared of the cubed stones, of the metal horns, of the rain, the thunder, all of which it never experienced before, when it was in Arkwood, when it flew above the large stone, and besides the large tree. <o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"> With a sudden consciousness, Ron flew back, back to Arkwood, back to The Great Meadow, back to the large stone and large tree. It went and rested on the large stone, and waited till evening, waited till Shawn came. Then, like every evening, Shawn came to the large stone and large tree, but this time there was a difference. In his hands was a kite. Diamond-shaped, and coloured with bright red, it is a standard kite, made by Shawn himself. And as usual, Shawn flew the kite, above the large stone and besides the large tree. And he didn’t even see the beaten up kite on the large stone.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"> Ron wanted to fly.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span></o:p></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span></o:p></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span></o:p></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #660000; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">AUTHOR'S NOTE : Ahh, kites. I can still remember my knee getting torn from a fall while playing my kite, with little pebbles in my flesh, and blood gushing out. (ok, this is outta context -.-) Alhamdulillah I was able to write again, though my writing have clearly been dulled by time. This was written during 'the writing regime' I gave to my friends as an exercise. (We're having a study camp, and I am the honorary 'Satanic Teacher'. lol XD) This was written to show that I was also doing work, and I'm glad I did. From the rest, I could see some interesting (if not odd) talents from Lee, Fadh, Mike and Dini. Anyways, this piece is a little shaky and dull, so lets hope I'll write some more and get my edge back. Thanks~! :)</span></o:p></div>freeze 2 farrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00757843797778640553noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6109504078057431591.post-46917397906181619872011-03-04T18:12:00.001-08:002011-03-08T22:12:57.091-08:00The Change"Change is imminent, no?"<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: justify;"> Given the circumstances, its not practical anymore to have a blog to write a single story, especially when the story is nowhere near completion. Not forgetting the other projects in my personal lobby, all of which are still waiting to be written. As such, I'm modifying the page to be something of a more casual nature, one of which I can narrate randomly, without having any consent of a serious storyline. Thus I wont screw myself of my writing edge any more than it is. (yes, my writing has become very blunt these days, and it saddens me so.) </div><br />
<div style="text-align: justify;"> In any case, I will be putting the "Punchbag Project" on hold, until 'Time' becomes a close friend of mine, and I can leisurely write until I die. (gediknya impian~) The same goes to all my other stories, short stories, semi-poems and comics. If I had a writing alter ego, I would most prolly tug at his leg now, crying and begging for forgiveness. ("Uwaahhh! Uwahhh! I'm sorry! I'll write! I promise you I'll write seriously now! X'O") lol. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"> So, I open up (modify) this page, officially, with the name "<b>incerto</b>"~! A platform for 'Sensual writings with a touch of ambiguity'. Oh how I wish I will continue writing. :) </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"> -f2f-</div>freeze 2 farrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00757843797778640553noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6109504078057431591.post-52615358438414605422009-03-17T04:12:00.001-07:002009-03-17T05:17:22.722-07:00<div align="left"><br />*It is important for readers to know that this prologue holds no importance.<br /><br /><strong><span style="font-size:130%;"></span></strong></div><div align="left"><strong><span style="font-size:180%;">PROLOGUE<br /></span></strong></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"><span style="font-family:times new roman;"></span></div><div align="left"><span style="font-family:times new roman;"></span></div><div align="left"><span style="font-family:times new roman;font-size:130%;">Kindergarten.<br />A time for immaturity, innocence, and most importantly, memories.<br />Our story is inspired by an incident that happened in a time such as that.<br /><br />On a bench, two kids were sitting down.</span><span style="font-family:times new roman;font-size:130%;"><br />The air was chilly, and a little piercing, reminding people of the change of seasons. With it, a not-so-fatal change in relationship will also happen.<br />On the right seat, a girl with blonde hair made an annoyed face.<br />“Yoshi-kun, if you don’t mind, could you tell me why you called me here already? Iron chef is going to start soon”, the girl asked.<br />“Su-chan, actually, I’m going to move to Tokyo tomorrow”, Kiyoshi made a worried tone.<br />It has been a whole year since the two started sitting there together, and they have been best friends since. The news that just broke made the atmosphere a little heavier.<br />“Why?”<br />“My dad received a new job. Plus, my sister is attending Tokyo U, so we’re moving. So, Su-chan, well…”<br />“Oh, so when are you leaving?” Su-chan turned towards Kiyoshi now.<br />“I told you already, I’m going tomorrow. Well, um… as I was saying…”<br />“Where are you going to go? Is it far?” Su-chan cut Kiyoshi off.<br />Su-chan is known to be clumsy and forgetful, and Kiyoshi understands that, but humans have limits.<br />“Um… Like I said, I’m going to Tokyo. And, it’s not that far. But, you see…”<br />“Why? Kiyoshi, why?”<br />Kiyoshi lost it.<br />“Shut up, Su-chan. Hear me out for a while. This may be the last time we can talk to each other. So we need to use this time wisely. If you have anything to say to me, say it now”, Kiyoshi said, getting serious.<br />“Ooooh… then, are you going to come back?”<br />“I don’t know.”<br />“Then let’s make a promise! A promise that makes sure you’ll come back”, Su-chan said, a little enthusiastic. The thing is, Kiyoshi can bet anything in the world that Su-chan won’t remember about these ten minutes later.<br />With a sigh, Kiyoshi said, “What kind of promise?”<br />Suddenly, Su-chan grabbed Kiyoshi’s hand and looked into his eyes.<br />With that single movement, the air became tight. A serious atmosphere formed, and Kiyoshi felt time stopped. As the cold wind blew, a mass of tension accumulated, and it rises by the second.<br />“Marry me.”<br />“Huh?”<br />As sudden, the tension broke. Just like that.<br />“What are you talking about? We’re not that age yet”, Kiyoshi was embarrassed.<br />“No, dummy! What I meant was, promise me that you’ll marry me”, Su-chan also turned red. “That way, you’ll have to come back, no matter what happens.”<br />This was it. There are times when a man just has to make a decision, even if he was only six years old. Kiyoshi thought deeply for a while, and then breathed in slowly, and exhaled. He was determined.<br />“I promise. One day, I’ll come back here and we’ll be married”, Kiyoshi said, tightening the grip on Su-chan’s hand.<br />With that, like before, the atmosphere had a sudden serious feeling, a resolve that cannot be broken. The both of them got closer, and their lips came yet closer, and when Kiyoshi closed his eyes, a familiar sound was heard.<br />BEEP.BEEP.<br />Su-chan looked at her watch, and with a gasp, said desperately, “Kyaa! Iron Chef’s starting!”<br />Yet again, the atmosphere broke.<br />“Bye Kiyoshi, see you tomorrow!” Su-chan leaped to her feet and began running home.<br />Tomorrow? Kiyoshi thought.<br />“No, wait! Su-chan, I won’t be here tomorrow!” Kiyoshi shouted, and started to catch up on her, but it was already too late. Su-chan was already out of sight.<br />Knowing Su-chan’s craze for Iron Chef and her unbeatable running skills, Kiyoshi gave up.<br />He slapped himself for being so stupid as to talk about serious things with Su-chan.<br />He sat again with the longest sigh humans ever made.<br />“It’s okay. If she doesn’t remember, I will.” Then, he stood and started walking home.<br />The cold wind made him shiver, and as he walked out of the park, the first snow came down. In a matter of minutes, the evening sky was full of white spots, the blessings of winter.<br />Kiyoshi looked upwards for a while, rubbing his hands together.<br />“I’m going to miss this place”, he said, and continued on walking.</span></div>freeze 2 farrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00757843797778640553noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6109504078057431591.post-2956314729885366772009-03-17T04:11:00.000-07:002009-03-17T04:12:50.732-07:00<div align="center"><span style="font-size:180%;"><strong>THE PUNCHBAG PROJECT</strong></span></div><p> </p><div align="center"><br /><span style="font-family:lucida grande;font-size:180%;"><strong>DELINQUE</strong></span></div>freeze 2 farrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00757843797778640553noreply@blogger.com0